How to Be a Feminist in the Bedroom

When it comes to feminism, many of us consider inequalities in society and the workplace. We want equal rights to vote, make reasonable salaries, make decisions about our health and bodies, and be respected as human beings no matter what our gender, ethnicity, age or abilities.

As you’ll learn from my latest Girl Boner® Radio guest, Dr. Alison Ash, cultivating such equality and respect in the bedroom can be just as important.

Feminist sexuality creates more intimate and pleasurable experiences for people of all genders, according to Alison, to which I say, OMG, yes, yes, YES! Here are some of the tenets she shared in our chat:

Feminist sexuality means…

…having full access to your no. “I often ask my clients if they feel like they have full access to their no, and if they don’t, their yes is meaningless,” she said, later adding that working this muscle is important in all facets of our lives. (We explored this pretty in-depth—what it means and examples—so definitely listen for more juiciness!)

…knowing yourself. “Being a feminist in the bedroom is so much about knowing what your edges are—your fears, your desires, your wants, your insecurities,” she said. “Having that kind of self knowledge is really empowering.” 

…expressing yourself, or, as she put it, learning how to share your wants and needs “vulnerably and courageously, from a place that can create intimacy.” (Please. Yes. Delicious.)

…helping our lovers and partners explore and express themselves. This allows you both to share in the process together, and sex, as Alison pointed out, is supposed to be a co-created experience. As we explored ways to “eat pussy like a champ,” she said even oral sex should be just as much about giving and receiving. 

“Every pussy’s different, and I know that what my pussy wants today is not what my pussy wanted yesterday or what my pussy will want tomorrow,” she said. “So for me to expect someone to know what I want is unfair.”

To learn more about all of this, plus Alison’s journey from surviving rape to empowering others around their sexuality, how to eat pussy like a pro, and Dr. Megan‘s thoughts for a listener who recently came out as bisexual and wants to feel confident going down on a fellow woman, stream the episode on iTunes, iHeart Radio, Stitcher Radio or below!

Want to work with Dr. Alison Ash or take one of her awesome workshops? Click here to learn more!