fe·tish noun ˈfe-tish also ˈfē-
: a strong and unusual need or desire for something
: a need or desire for an object, body part or activity for sexual excitement
Why is it that when I first think of the word fetish, my brain conjures an image of a creepy dude enthusiastically sucking (read drooling all over) a woman’s bare heel? Hmm….
[Stock photo deleted. You’re welcome!]
You don’t have to answer that. Lucky for us non-foot-suck fans, no offense to you who are, there’s so much more to fetishes! Based on the above definitions, we all have fetishes. Healthfully celebrating them is an awesome thing. Why? Because excitement makes us happy. Happy people have more sex. Consensual sex increases happiness. In other words, the more excitement we seek out in our lives, the more gratifying our whole darn lives will be.
10 Common Fetishes
1. TRICHOPHILIA: being aroused by hair
Body hair can be seriously hot, if you’re a trichophilac. While this passion may only involve hair on someone’s head, genital, chest and even arm or leg hair can also entice.
2. AUTOANDROPHILIA: when a woman who identifies as female, imagining herself as a male for arousal
Who doesn’t love a little role-play daydreaming now and then? Wearing or evening imagining wearing a strap-on can be HOT. The male equivalent, imagining himself as female, is known as authogynephilia.
3. VOYEURISM: getting turned on by seeing others having sex
Unless you’re asexual, I hope you relate! Research shows that women are sexually stimulated by a broad range of sexual imagery, including heterosexual, homosexual and even animal sex, whereas straight men tend to be namely turned on by straight women. So basically, we’re turned on by ALL sex. It’s important to let ourselves feel aroused, however; too often, a woman’s body is turned on, but her thoughts and feelings—such as shame or anxiety—put up barriers. This also works the other way—arousal from being or imagining being watched during sex. (Yum.)
4. SADISM: experiencing or inflicting pain on another for sexual pleasure
I don’t personally relate to pain as a turn-on, but it’s super common, healthy and normal. As long as you aren’t causing injury and whatever you do is consensual, BDSM (bondage, discipline, domination, submission, sadism and masochism) can enhance sexual intimacy and pleasure. If you do engage, Laura Berman, PhD recommends having a “safe word,” which either partner can state to end whatever’s happening if it grows uncomfortable.
5. PYGOPHILIA: a sexual passion for butts
Are you a “butt person?” Apparently many folks are, deriving huge arousal perks from rear ends. And we’re not just talking looking at or grabbing them. Many women enjoy inserting toys or fingers in a partner’s anus or having the same done for them. If you’d like to experiment with this, I have one word: MOISTURE. Diving in without lube, natural or commercial, can be pretty uncomfortable for the, er, pokee.
6. STIGMATOPHILIA: an intense attraction to piercings and tattoos
A 2012 Harris Poll showed that of the 2,016 adults in the U.S. surveyed, 21 percent had a tattoo and about one-third said the skin art made them feel more attractive and strong. If piercings and tattoos make you feel or consider a partner sexier, both can be major turn-ons.
7. MAZOPHILIA: sexual interest in breasts
Yep! Women, regardless of sexual orientation, find breasts enticing—probably partly because our own are so erogenous. Contrary to popular belief, breast size usually doesn’t matter, unless the only breasts you look at or think about during arousal and orgasm are a particular size.
8. METROPHILIA: being sexually aroused by poetry
If reading or hearing poetry melts you into a puddle of SIGH… there’s a good chance you’re turned on. Talk about romantic foreplay! If this little diddy turns you on, it may be more of a cheesy humor fetish.
You’re welcome to nab and share this “poetic” gem image on Facebook—just be sure to tag the Girl Boner page: Facebook.com/MyGirlBoner.
9. PODOPHILIA: foot fetishism
Okay, so my initial thought about foot-sucking wasn’t far-fetched. While this one is more commonly claimed by men, many Girl Boner’s are tickled by well-kept feet, foot stimulation and foot massage. Some podophiliacs are also attracted to foot odor and taste.
10. UNDERWEAR FETISHISM: sexual attraction to observing or handling underwear
This fetish goes beyond the fun of wearing or seeing sexy lingerie. If you have this fetish, you enjoy watching another dressing or undressing from their skivvies or the touch and feel of sexy undergarments. Seems pretty common, right? If you’re not comfy bearing it all, check out How to Feel Sexier Naked for useful tips!
To learn more about fetishes and hear my chat with Gia Nova, a celebrated burlesque and fetish performer who not only dances with fire (literally), but designs her own costumes., visit this link on iTunes:
Gia and I talked about her path from a curious but shy young woman to a feature dancer who’s appeared in world-popular publications, including Hustler, Playboy and Penthouse, what her glamorous performances are like behind the scenes, tips for stepping into the BDSM world, if you’re so inclined, and more. I could’ve gabbed with her for hours!
You can also tune in via Global Voice Broadcasting or Stitcher Radio. If you’ve subscribed, you’ll also receive today’s episode in which I explore whether sex work should be legalized with renowned sociologist, Dr. Chauntelle Tibbals!
What’s your favorite fetish? Or the oddest one you’ve encountered? Any sex-tastic questions you’d like answered on the air? I love hearing from you! ♥