“Touch comes before sight, before speech. It is the first language and the last, and it always tells the truth.” — Margaret Atwood, Der Blinde Mörder
Last week during my interview on Let’s Talk Sex, Dr. Jane Greer posed poignant questions about the link between poor body image and sexual unease. Since then, I’ve received emails from several courageous women grappling significantly with both (♥ to you!).
It’s often difficult to determine which happens first, the lack of sexual empowerment or body dislike, but the connection is inarguable and the effects, often grueling. Low sexual self-confidence tinkers with body image and vice versa—the setup for a self-defeating downward slope. Looking back on my own experiences, it’s crazy obvious how much sensuality was amiss when my body-embracement was nil and my Girl Boner was hiding away in a dark corner. (Now there’s a visual… ;)) It’s a glorious thing to have come full circle, and I wish the same for anyone on a similar path. I’m sure you who’ve blazed empowerment trails of your own can relate.
Thankfully, no matter where we stand in our self- and sexual- embracement journeys, we can flip that equation around. I personally believe that moving forward has a lot to do with sensual living.
Here at Girl Boner Central, we believe that sexuality far surpasses what happens in our skivvies. We also believe that embracing our sexy, sensual selves makes way for growth and fulfillment in all facets of our lives.
The following list could undoubtedly go on and on, but I tried to hit some of the biggies. As you read, keep track of how many make you think, “Yes! Totally me!” You may also want to take note of your nos, particularly if you deem certain traits worth changing.
25 Signs of Sensual Living
1. You make a point of savoring the smell, taste and appearance of food and find heavy distraction while eating bothersome.
2. You smell bouquets at the flower shop before deciding on a purchase.
3. Your sleep in silky PJs, underwear or your birthday suit, and choose bedsheets largely based on feel.
4. It’s tough to reach P.D.A. overload, in your opinion; the more affection the better.
5. If you close your eyes and recall an aromatic memory, the smell seems to resurface.
6. Clothing feel is often as important to you as its appearance.
7. You consider yourself a highly sensitive person.
8. When sitting in a taxi cab or restaurant, a nostalgic song begins playing and you can’t ignore it; it “takes you back” pronto, affecting your mood.
9. Music is known to move you to tears.
10. When you visit museums, you take time to observe the colors, texture and emotions works that strike you.
11. You love petting and holding furry animals.
12. If you had to choose one dance to engage in, you’d choose a slow, partner-embracing number over a rapid solo techno boogie. (Assume you have the skills for both. ;))
13. You prioritize and delight in pleasurable self-care means, such as sudsy baths, massage and lotions that feel luscious on your skin.
14. You revel in trying new foods, particularly while exploring foreign places.
15. You prefer not to buy fresh foods online; you want to see and touch fruits and vegetables pre-purchase.
16. If you’re seated at a restaurant near too much noise, chill or light, you’re likely to request reseating.
17. The presentation of foods, table settings and gifts is important to you. (Amazon wrapping is well worth that $3.99!)
18. When sitting on the sofa with your partner, you sit as close to him or her as possible.
19. You love, love, love hugging!
20. You cherish being naked—or would, if you felt more confident. (If the latter is true, check out Sexual Confidence: How to Feel Sexier Naked.)
21. Your partner’s taste and smell rank high on your value/turn-on list.
22. Locking eyes with your lover and observing his or her sensual gaze turns you on big time.
23. You often relish passionate kissing, touching and being touched as much or more than intercourse.
24. You value orgasm—yours and, when applicable, your partner’s.
25. Merely taking this quiz tickled your Girl Boner!
Did you find yourself nodding or shaking your head to most of these items? Which struck you most? When do you feel most sensual? While the above isn’t a clinically tested or diagnostic exercise, and many factors affect sensual appeal, I definitely believe that the more sensuousness we embrace, the better. The best part? We can cultivate sensuality in countless empowering ways. (More on that soon…)
Speaking of tickling the senses, we’re having a cake contest! Help celebrate Girl Boner’s 1-year birthday by visiting Girl Boner on Facebook and casting a vote for your favorite sexy cake—one I’ve posted or a creative concoction or find of your own. Cast your vote via Facebook or Twitter by Friday for a chance to win a Girl Boner gift pack. I can’t wait to hear your thoughts.
Thanks so much for your continual support! You help make Girl Boner Central an arousing place for many. ♥